When gospel singer Larnelle Harris and his wife Mitzy had their first big argument, they began to pray that God would teach them how to "fight fair." Larnelle wrote, "Why did we pray like that? Because for us divorce is not an option. We know that as Jesus Christ is our focal point, we will be able to remain true to our commitment to each other."

Many couples mutually agree to dissolve their marriage because they can't get along, or they think they are incompatible, or they no longer feel in love. It's called "no-fault divorce."

There is no such thing as no-fault divorce, according to Jesus—only hardness-of-heart divorce. Stony-heartedness plagues all of us at times, and that makes all married couples potential divorcées. But even when the Bible allows for divorce in certain situations (see Mt. 19:9; 1 Cor. 7:15), it must always be understood in the context of Jesus' words, "What God has joined together, let not man separate" (Mt. 19:6).

A troubled marriage can grow into a loving and lasting relationship if husband and wife recognize any hardness in their hearts that could destroy their marriage. As they ask God to soften them and fill them with Christ's love, He will teach them not only to "fight fair" but also to love freely.  — Dennis J. De Haan